Toasted Oatmeal and Coconut Muffins

There are two things that I want immediately when my feet hit the ground in the morning: coffee and carbs.

Modern wisdom tells us that this craving is due to a carbohydrate addiction, that man was never meant to eat wheat, that gluten might as well have come out of the devil's asshole, that we would be much better off eating as our Paleolithic forefathers ate.

HOGWASH, y'all.

The Paleolithic Era was more that two million years ago and whether you like it or not, that has been more than enough time for the vast majority of us to develop the ability to digest whole grains, including the ones that contain gluten.

Oh, you don't believe in evolution, you say? Gandhi ate bread. Mother Teresa definitely ate bread. Jesus was freaking obsessed with bread and he talked about it non-stop. I'd be willing to bet that every religious leader any of us ever aspired to follow (cult leaders excluded), ate bread regularly.

And if you're an atheist or agnostic? Bread tastes a-maz-ing. Believe in that.

When I wake up and eat complex carbs, I feel good, like someone has switched a light on inside my brain. The reason for this is simple: carbs are the fuel that power the human brain to think, learn and create memories. So, this week, I challenge you to eat a moderate amount of healthy carbs and see how you feel. Pile a piece of multigrain sourdough toast high with vegetables and chards of parmesan and top it with a fried egg; slurp down buckwheat noodles from a fragrant soup; mix old-fashioned rolled oats into your meatloaf. Or, bake up some toasted oatmeal and coconut muffins.

Here's to a future free of carbophobes!

Oatmeal coconut muffins
Adapted from the January 2013 issue of Cooks Illustrated 
-Makes between 12 and 16 muffins, depending on your mix-ins

8T coconut oil
2 cups (6oz) old-fashioned rolled oats
1 3/4 cups (8 3/4 oz) flour*
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/4 cups brown sugar
1 3/4 cups (one can) light coconut milk
2 large eggs at room temp, beaten
mix-ins such as chopped mango, peaches, cashews, or shredded coconut (optional)

Heat 2T coconut oil in a pan over medium. Add oats and toast, stirring occasionally until they smell like popcorn. Put toasted oats into a blender or food processor and grind into a flour-like texture. Mix with flours, salt, baking powder and baking soda.

Melt the remaining 6T oil and combine it with the sugar. Using a whisk, add coconut milk and then eggs. Gently whisk the dry ingredients into this bowl in two additions. It's okay if your batter is lumpy, but make sure there are no dry pockets of flour. Let rest for 20 minutes.

Meanwhile, preheat your oven to 375 and grease a muffin tin (my muffins rose the best in a non-stick pan) with more coconut oil. Fold in your mix-ins at the very last minute. Fill the molds almost to the brim and top with oats, ground nuts, or extra coconut. Bake for 18 minutes, rotating the pan 180 degrees half way through.

These will keep well in an air-tight container for about four days.

*I used 1 cup whole wheat flour and 3/4 cup all-purpose flour.